Self Improvement – What Do Others Think About You? (part 2)

Keep Smiling.
Body language is often more important than the words you use. After studying conversations in work and social places, researchers worldwide found that when it comes to remembering information, only seven per cent comes from the words we use – the rest comes from body language.
We naturally prefer a person who smiles, walks confidently and looks us in the eye because it lifts our spirits – and everyone likes to feel happier. But when we attend a social or work event, we’re often so nervous about meeting new people, or doing something “wrong” that all we can do is think about ourselves. So if someone talks to us, we either clam up, or we ramble on endlessly!
To make a good first impression, focus on making others feel comfortable. They’re just as nervous as you are, so don’t worry about dazzling them with witty talk, just help them feel comfortable. Ask them questions about themselves, or share a joke.
“Laughter helps defuse tension reducing stress – hormone levels,” explains psychologist Dr Shapiro. “Plus it helps you feel closer to each other because you are both sharing the fact that you see something from the same point of view.”

I’m Lucky.
Feeling more confident about how others see you can have a positive effect on your luck – because it seems that self – confidence breeds yet more luck. As proof, Dr Wiseman’s researchers gave 100 people a “lucky charm” for a month. It was nothing but an ordinary coin, and a month later, no measurable difference was found in how fate favoured the people, yet 30 per cent still felt their luck had improved.
They said they felt more confident, which turn made it easier to relax around others. This helped them make a good first impression. Some even said they felt so enthusiastic, they’d keep carrying the coin even after the survey ended.

Body Language Clues.
When it comes to creating first impressions, little things count. Try this short self – test. How many of these things do you do when you meet someone new?

When I meet someone for the first time, I:
1. Smile and lean towards them when they are  speaking.
2. Talk at the same speed as the person, so they feel comfortable with me.
3. Show that I am relaxed about my body. (For example, sit without hunching, and appear relaxed.)
4. Share sensitive and vulnerable sides of my personality, perhaps with a joke.
5. Interrupt conversations with what is on my mind, no matter what else people are talking about.
6. Tell impressive facts about myself.
7. Try to talk about my social or financial success.
Psychologists have found that all these behaviours leave an impression on others. The first your tend to leave a positive first impression. The last three don’t.